So my sister says my blog is too depressing? Wow, can you believe that? Huwhoah! I mean, com'on now.
So she doesn't read it. Yeah, I know. I don't get too many visitors but that's okay. I have been looking through what I have written and it is pretty neat - even if it is depressing. This is the longest I have ever done a journal. And anonymously if somebody wants to read it who cares. It's out there for the big Guy and everybody to see.
So I drive to Atlanta. It is almost 2000 miles from where I live. The reason I came out here is to see my dad and her as well. But, ya know, I am two weeks off a divorce. And, Hey! it's christmas, ho, ho, ho, ha, ha, ha, and all that stuff. Time to be close with loved ones and so on and so forth.
I am really trying not to be cynical. I mean I am. Yes I want to spend the time with loved ones, you know like my dad, sister, and brother in law and even my neices if I can fit it in. However, I am not in the mood for big "happy" family get togethers. Yes I do say happy cynically. I am sure many people can relate! In fact, I just read a post about a "happy" family get together.
Anyway, I am about 200 miles out and she lays it on me that she has another family living here at the house. Okay, well that's not so bad accept for the fact that the husband guy person, ribbed the shit out of me about my "problem." two years ago when my wife, kids, and family were out here. This guy was also party dude cigarette in one hand six pack in the other. Doesn't bother to take the can of beer out of the six pack ring. This is right out of the movie "Vacation." This is two years ago. I did not peg the guy for being a "family man" ya know?
Not that I know how to deal with that kind of thing now, but back then, there is no way I could deal with it. And it showed. I said something stupid to my sister. I was making fun of her or something like that. My brother-in-law called me on it. The wave of shame swept over me like something that really sweeps over stuff. And then the anger and then the rage and then blamo - another christmas down the toilet.
So, two weeks on the heals of a divorce, christmas time, and cousin Eddie waiting for me at the homestead. One two hundred miles miles out she tells me, oh yeah, by the way. . .
About Me
- Floyd Hill
- Circa 2006 - Well first off, I am an addict and I admit I am powerless over it and it has made my life unmanageable. So much so that I now have confirmation that my wife is going to divorce me. I believe that less than .01% of the world's (human) population is mentally healthy and this mental health comes about only by pure sheer accident. We're all fucked up it is just a matter of to what degree. As an engineer, I am still wondering when I get to drive the train.
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ReplyDeleteThursday, 1 PM in the lobby - too cold outside. I'll be the fat pregnant one with the tall three year old. LOL
ReplyDeleteI was wondering, do you remember my name?
ReplyDeleteI keep thinking of things I feel I need to say, they're scattered, pregnancy syndrome, sorry. 75 south, exit at Barrett Pkwy, turn right & get in far left lane and it should be the second left turn. If you pass it, just do a U. Most of the people over there aren't very courteous, so be careful.
ReplyDeleteOh goodie, I get to chastise you. You spent big bucks to talk to me and you don’t remember my name. LOL I can’t quit laughing; should I tell you before Thursday? Is that why you didn’t call my cell when you got into town? Everyone is asleep, if you decide you want my name before Thursday...
ReplyDeleteYes, a J
ReplyDeleteFirst two correct and three to go
ReplyDeleteHave you ventured out anywhere? Any meetings?
ReplyDeleteYou did remember. Darn, now I can't pick at you.
ReplyDeleteHow many people are in the house?
I am leaving the house. I'm hoping to stop by the bookstore and pick up a couple of 50% off date books for Mark. See you after while.
ReplyDeleteTo me your blog isn't depressing. You just seem a bit tortured. I've known men like you before.
ReplyDeleteThe daughter wants to go back there for lunch again and said with you. I thought I would feel awkward somehow, but I didn't. I guess I feel like I know you too well to feel strange.
the word - ntufckuf
By the way, did you call the woman from group and tell her that we behaved ourselves - I didn't bite, this time. LOL
ReplyDeleteYour blog is not depressing at all. It is very informative and wonderful.
ReplyDeleteYou communicate your thoughts and dreams well.